101 COUCHES

some times when I am alone, I dream of owning a beautiful couch.....

See, no one tells you the hidden costs of autism. The incredible prices of therapy that aren't covered by insurance; the diets; the supplements; the swings- these things people hear about when they read about the cost of autism.

I am here to tell you about one of the hidden costs....

we are on our 7th couch since our son was born. He turns 8 next week- and we need a new couch AGAIN.

Does that make it a couch a year?

I no longer go to real furniture stores to look for a couch. We can't afford the expensive ones; it will be ruined in a few months anyway.

See, Autism HATES couches.

Autism causes kids to soil their pants at the least expected moments.....so all of our couches are peed on or worse...

Autism causes kids to make couches fall apart.....

I really haven't figured out HOW; it just happens.

I think it is an autistic fairy that slips into the house at night while we are sleeping- it takes cushions and removes the slip covers....

it hides slip covers in weird places.....

it takes the cushions and throws them outdoors to get rained on....

I know that some of you who haven't lived with autism would read this post and say, "HOW?"

"SURELY if someone was watching this child better, he wouldn't ruin the couches!"

I would answer to you, "you don't know autism"

See, it is not my child who ruins the couches, it is autism.....it lurks its head out to drive me insane.

After a few days of severe autistic activity; parents can become brain numb...so letting a child eating on the couch while perched on the back, hanging upside down...becomes OK.

What was once totally unacceptable behavior becomes.....

not so bad.


Seriously.

When the oppositonality; the physical thrasing; the soiled clothes; the phone calls from the school to come and get your child while you have a baby who needs to be nursed in tow; the pulling off the clothes; the spinning in circles while screaming a high pitch yell.........all comes together like a tidal wave over a period of a few days; you need rest.

And rest often means that it is ok to hang on the couch- to paint one's body on the couch with shampoo and toothpaste....or god knows what else. You pick your battles because if you don't you loose sight of what is important. You become a screaming banshee instead of a loving mother.

I figure the day will come when I can own a beautiful couch....

for now, I'll dream of them inventing one made out of cement but feels soft ...

indestructable but still a place to rest.....

a girl can dream, right?

I'll share with you photos of our latest victim; complete with a missing cushion.....

if you promise not to judge me for being a bad parent; see, I LOVE my child, it's the autism that gets me drained.....and let's me allow him to destroy our couches...I mean, they're only objects; He mean so much more to me than they do.

In my world; he's not autistic; HE'S CALEB.....who has autism.......and who on most days is a wonderful, bright, happy little boy.


You know, come to think of it, by the time we CAN have a beautiful couch, I probably will want these ones with the memories engraved into them....

battle wounds.......or journal entries.....

it's all in how you look at it!